"Other girls envy me, you know. And guys don't see what the problem is." I can see why they wouldn't", I said. But she didn't smile."When we met, toni...ht", she went on, "it all came back. The confusion, the pain. The urge to have you. Not just for the sex, but for myself, my heart and soul. I only felt that once, back with you at college. Those last months were hell. I kept following you, watching you, dreaming of you, but you never saw it."No, I never did. Who would have?She rose on her elbow,. .. I went with Denise to ... that bar ... a few months ago, but I swear I didn't leave with anyone; I just danced a few times. Denise picked up a ... young guy, but I just drove. I drove her car home ... here ... but I was by myself."Linda had been staring at the photographs as she spoke, and looked up to see how Bill was reacting, but his expression hadn't changed. Her tears had slowed, and she wiped her face with her sleeves before she continued, "I ... I watched them ... fooling around in. Touch him...' 'it's not like she wouldlet him into our bed... would she?' and Roberta's imagination would beforced to serve up another even more extreme scene. His brain simply wasnot equipped to cope with the present situation. His impending loss ofvirginity seemed to be very far away compared to the feeling inside, atoxic mix of nausea, defeat and sheer, red panic.Feeling extremely weak, he actually considered staying there in thedriveway. If he was to just stay there then everything would. He responded about 20 min later saying that would work and we setup a time.Around 7pm that night I heard the soft knock again at the front door. I opened it and saw the same guy again with his friend standing behind him. I welcomed them both in and walked them over to the living room. I was a mix of horny and nervous with two guys being there. I started to second guess what I had gotten myself into. Would I be able to live with this decision kept going through my head. One time was me.
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